Random – Prepare for the ultimate war on weakness
We discussed not that long ago that I don’t watch TV very much anymore, being I can download anything I do like from the US or the ABC. What we didn’t discuss was why I made the move away from TV in the first place, since I said I didn’t really care.
That was a lie, since the truth was too difficult to deal with at the time. The truth is that while my trust in TV broadcasters was never at an all time high, it was broken completely by a single programming choice made by those weak dogs at the ABC back in July 2004;
If you never saw it, I pity you and your pathetically empty life. I myself only ever saw a few episodes live on ABC before it was cut, but I can assure you every second I did watch converted me from a weak fist-less dog to the pumped up, panda-adoring ginge-a-licious I am today. The show revolved around a group of characters, each using their own special abilities and skills, to achieve the tasks set by the most extreme man on the planet – Steve Foxx.
Steve Foxx rallying the pandas for battleNot only was Double the Fist the greatest television series ever created in any universe, dimension or theoretical membrane, it gave humanity the most epic scale of true awesomeness – the full fist. The Full Fist meant strength, power, knowledge and more importantly, pain. Each week Rod, Memphisto and The Womp would jump off cliffs, feed schoolgirls into lawnmowers, become possessed by Aztec demi-gods, or be chased through an abandoned warehouse by flying sharks.
Rodd running from the cloned panda loggers that Memphisto created in his pyramid, while he was possessed by an Aztec demi-god…….……seriously
Iceberg – we salute you
…to arts & crafts
With such a clearly epic show is it any wonder that it paid off it’s backers inside the first few episodes, was syndicated all over the world, and that it beat those whiny slags from “Kath and Kim” to the 2004 AFI award for “Best Television Comedy, Sit-Com or Sketch”? And yet those weak, spineless filth mongers from ABC programming decided the show wasn’t “compatible” with their “over-55′s target demographic”. What those bottom feeders didn’t realise was that the oldies love this shit -
Rod Foxx doing his bit to engage the ABC’s“target demographic” while playing “Super Bowls”
Luckily for all you fist-less pond scum ABC TV had a change in management, and so the greatest event in mankind’s history is set to occur in just 3 days – just like the coming Rapture, Steve Foxx is returning from 4 years in outer space to once again wage war on weakness and personal hygiene.
That’s right folks –
STARTS THIS THURSDAY NIGHT
Prepare for the end of weakness
In preparation for the coming planetary falcon punch, Steve Foxx has started the official Double the Fist website to help all those yet to be blessed by DTF and it’s majesty to embrace it. They may have relegated them to ABC2, but I can assure you that digital set-top box sales will explode after this Thursday’s 9:30pm premiere.
And so with the news shared I leave you with one of Memphisto’s classic moments of wisdom from Season 1, and a link to the original secret DTF page on the ABC’s website.
There are 1 Comments to "Random – Prepare for the ultimate war on weakness"
Oh. Fuck. Yes.